LOL I love all of this. This is why

rocks. I wouldn't keep coming back if I couldn't handle the criticism.
The whole thing about my lady situation- Thanks guys. I learned a lot. And I'm over it. haha
Ivan- I'm not looking to get something more cushy necessarily, but my dad's wj is really, really nice, functional, and I love that it has more room for people in the back.
And yes, it does get better mpg than mine. I've spent a LOT of time behind the wheel in it. We've had it since I was a junior in high school.
A major turning point for me was when I drove my drums to a buddy's house to play some music. I have a decent sized drum kit. (4 toms, bass and snare+ all hardware/cymbals.)
He lives about 15 miles from me. The xj was sagging badly. The rear suspension was way low, and it was sad trying to get onto the freeway with the weight.(No oomph) I averaged 12 mpg driving over there.
4 months ago, I played a show in San Mateo. Took the drums in the wj, with my suitcase and stuff too. It didn't even flinch, hauled ass the whole way. I averaged 65-75 mph the whole trip, and got 19 mpg. (I can't even drive the xj 70 without my teeth rattling)
So no, crap econobox is not an option. A sedan isn't an option. (A wagon is) Sometimes I think the wj would just better fit my needs.
The xj isn't going anywhere for a while, if at all.