You just need a few trail runs to break things in... and to break things.
My ride right now is incredible, like a cadillac. I'm am serious!! It didn't start off that way though...
I started with pro comp 3" about 4 years ago, you know, when the XJ was still considered a siissy soccer mom rig. Oh, how things have changed. That Procomp was very stiff !! Even after trail rides. Then I added a bb and death wobble started. Then to tereflex springs than rubicon express then to 6" Tereflex springs for the front (my wife was gettin' ready to divorce me). The rear are now 6" Rusty non-military wrappers and a Tereflex shackle. I run Rancho 9000's (best shock for a daily driver off-road rig). I have lock-out Warn hubs, currie steering RE drop brackets, Tereflex adj upper and lower control arms, Tereflex quick dc's for the sway bar, no rear sway bar, lockers (no-slip in the rear, lock-rite front). I'm running 10" mickey II's with 35" SS Trxus radial MT's. The diffs also carry 4:56's, perfect for the auto and 4.0 liter 6. the transfer has a tereflex hd sye, that at 7 inches of lift allows me to run the same length d-shaft front and rear. that comes in handy.
After many trail rides, and 70,000 + road miles, my XJ runs and drives great. I now have a daily driver Grand Cherokee (Baby budget boost Grand) so I don't drive the XJ as much. I usually run it once a week on the road. I can drive 70 mph, faster if I wanted to, and it rides and handles superbly. The suspension is soft yet contrilled and the only noise you hear with stereo off is a gentle hum of the Trxus with 20,000 miles on them. It was a long and trying road to get to this point. The parts that are available for the cherokee now are fantastic if you select wisely. Starting off with your first lift, you should have an idea of your final destination of parts. That will save you money. Definately the first thing you want to decide on is the size tire you'll eventually want to run.
All the parts will add up, as you lift you will encounter binding, so steering and ca's are an issue. shocks that you can physically adj for weather (i.e.windy conditions) and off, or on road, and trailer towing demands (get rid off the bar pins while your at it, they make noise too). rancho has that covered. The spring rates are important, I have been pleased with both RE and Tereflex coils, Rusty's rear non-military are doing fine for rear duty combined with a Tereflex shackle. with more lift comes the need for adj ca's and re drop brackets (db's will change a jeep at 7"s of lift to a better than stock ride.)longer brake lines. now with more heighth, you will prob. encounter vibes. shim the rear, warn hubs for the front and tom woods d-shafts can make the annoying hummm go away. tire selection is key too. i ran ltb's for a while. they were great off road and horrible on the road. with the trxus now available, that will cover just about any off-road demand with a very pleasant on road ride.
I never would have believed that I could have such a great on road ride with all that increddible off-road beast unleashed. Running home from work last night on my anticipated weekly XJ run, I felt power under foot, comfort in the handling, and a quiet hummmmm from the trxus... I almost fell asleep. A little Evenescence took care of that.
IS IT DONE, FINISHED??... HELL NO, That XJ is my ADDICTION!!
For what it's worth, Thats my story, (and yes, I'm still happily married)
Greddy