Cripes! You sound like Heather. She was gone all week for work and got home Friday evening and the first thing she said was, "I really hate your beard." No I love you. I missed you. Just hate.
Not to go off on a tangent but...I'm a bit fascinated by hair. So the hair on most heads (excluding mine of course) grows indefinitely. Yet arm hair, leg hair (yes I shaved for a long time for cycling...get over it!), hell even pubic hair...knows when it's supposed to stop growing? My leg hair never grew back longer or thicker. Nor did the arm hair. Facial hair is kind of like head hair...it supposedly will grow and grow but may reach a point where it stops. What's even more strange is that on some parts of the face, it grows quicker than others. I think I want to see how long my facial hair can get.
Mother Nature is a like a mad scientist.