New tires= upset wife. Why?

[8Mud]

Read an articale a while back asking women and men to list there preferences, in the order of priority. Believe the first three on the womens list was, (a little poetic licsense) if I can´t eat it, wear it or sit on it, I´m not interested. Men was, if i can´t kiss it, drive it or drink it, I´m not interestred. Farther down the list, got even more interesting, comparing scented candles, with hunting dogs, or was it scented hunting dogs, with burning candles, oh heck forget it. :kissyou:

 

[RichP]

During my 21 years of marriage I have discovered some truths:

1. Never borrow the baster to top off your battery even with clean distilled water.
2. Never borrow the electric knife to trim foam for a new headliner.
3. Never buy her an expensive steak knife or carving set for her birthday or christmas unless you want a blender and electric knife for yours.
4. Keep a good emergency supply of birthday, anniversary, mothers day cards in the lockable drawer of the tool chest so that at 11pm when you realize your screw up you at least have a card..
5. Tone of voice from her means FAR more than the words themselves... it redefines websters and is the only time 'Yes' means 'NO'....and can mean the difference between 'gettin some' and becoming friendly with mary five fingers. Websters could dedicate 10 pages to the differnt tones of a women sigh...
6. "Honey, can you do something for me when you get a chance' is the equivilent of the navy command 'Turn to'.
7. When trying to make points NEVER wash yours and her clothes without first going thru ALL YOUR pockets for pens and markers and hers too.

 

[YELLAHEEP]

Jeezus, thanks for your personal stories guys - makes me appreciate my wife even more!

I've got it good! My wife has always understood my gear-headded-ness. She never bitches when I gotta drop some dough into the Heep. But then again, I do include her in my decisions / plans for the purchases. Heck, and that's only part of how wonderful she is!

Hinkley knows what I'm talkin' about.... He was present in Moab during my discussion with her about changing from Detroits to ARB's. She said "get 'em" and dummy me was the one saying I couldn't afford 'em.... HE wanted to be the one to smack me with the fryin' pan because I got the green light and didn't take it....

She supported my "need" to upgrade from a 1/2 ton truck to the one ton diesel dually I have now, the purchase of my car trailer, the '46 Oldsmobile I have sitting in the garage, and the '65 Riviera parked beside the house - and the expenses that come along with those..... The driveway extension and RV pad, and my friggin' outta control die-cast collection.



Sorry guys, she doesn't have a sister.... :spin1:

 

[Beezil]

unreal.....

You fawkin eunuchs need to ask for your balls back.

you INFORM. you don't ask PERMISSION.

everytime I hear someone post "hurray, my wife said I could buy a set of shocks" or something like that, it makes me sick.

free your inner alpha-male

 

[BUCKYXJ]

unreal.....

You fawkin eunuchs need to ask for your balls back.

you INFORM. you don't ask PERMISSION.

everytime I hear someone post "hurray, my wife said I could buy a set of shocks" or something like that, it makes me sick.

free your inner alpha-male

This from a man who still lives with his mom... :wstupid:
DIG IT!

 

[Churchlady]

Let this be a warning to the newlyweds of . Women's messaging systems are skewed and things aren't always what they may seem.

[On the other hand, things might be exactly as they seem, per the dead-literal heroine of my alltime favorite email joke.]

George, the best postman in the world, was retiring after 30 years on the same route & on his last day there was a gift for him at virtually every house: a check, fine fishing tackle for his favorite hobby, etc.

At one address the door was opened by the gorgeous lady of the house clad in a transparent negligee. She took George's arm & led him upstairs where she proceeded to undress him & make seismic love to him, then told him to come down to the breakfast room when he was dressed.

He came down to a beautiful table set w/fresh-squeezed OJ, blueberry waffles, Smithfield ham, freshly-ground coffee. He ate in stunned silence.

Only as he finished the last of his coffee did he notice a dollar bill tucked under the saucer. He picked it up & asked, "What's this?"

"Oh, that's from my husband. I told him you were retiring & that we must get a gift for you, & he said, 'F--- him. Give him a buck'.
The breakfast was my idea."

 

[Beezil]

This from a man who still lives with his mom... :wstupid:
DIG IT!

huh?

was that an attempt at the overused but under delivered momjoke?

weak.

keep tryin.

 

[OT]

huh?

was that an attempt at the overused but under delivered momjoke?

weak.

keep tryin.

Mom tell you to write that?

 

[BUCKYXJ]

huh?

was that an attempt at the overused but under delivered momjoke?

weak.

keep tryin.

I don't have time to keep trying I don't live on here like some of you do. Anyway gotta go do some wheeling...

 

[Beezil]

I don't have time to keep trying I don't live on here like some of you do. Anyway gotta go do some wheeling...

weak. until you meet me, stay off the expired mom joke...

and you might wanna work on your back-peddling too.

 

[Lincoln]

weak. until you meet me, stay off the expired mom joke...

and you might wanna work on your back-peddling too.

Stop being pissy, that's my job.

Besides I now someone that needs some training. We'll fix you.

 

[Beezil]

Stop being pissy, that's my job.

Besides I now someone that needs some training. We'll fix you.

I need to go shoot pottery.

 

[Churchlady]

huh?

was that an attempt at the overused but under delivered momjoke?

weak.

keep tryin.

Whew. I thought that was to me.

 

[Urban Redneck]

weak. until you meet me, stay off the expired mom joke...

and we'll stay off your's.

Fixed it for ya...oh, crap this isn't the Den....

 

[OT]

Fixed it for ya...oh, crap this isn't the Den....

I love it. It's a "non-Den" Den thread.

 

[Jeepin_rebel]

Maybe you should should pull your head outa yer arse and find a good woman like we have. Maybe then you wont be such a bitter a hole........also would like to add I dare you to say something remotely demanding to my wife and see how fast she would put you teeth down your neck and you butt on the ground.

 

[Lincoln]

Maybe you should should pull your head outa yer arse and find a good woman like we have. Maybe then you wont be such a bitter a hole........also would like to add I dare you to say something remotely demanding to my wife and see how fast she would put you teeth down your neck and you butt on the ground.

We're not in Kansas anymore.......

 

[Jeepin_rebel]

Actually funny you should say that.....I live in Kansas. Any other questions?

 

[Beezil]

Actually funny you should say that.....I live in Kansas. Any other questions?

yeah.....who are you talking to?

try the quote button.

 

[Jeepin_rebel]

yeah.....who are you talking to?

try the quote button.

Geee smart guy look at the damn thread above it. Like i said earlier remove your head from your arse ....BEFOR you sufficate