Read the entire article below, it blames Mike Hale for the whole thing......
(CNN) -- People nearly 900 miles away felt a magnitude-5.2 earthquake that shook southern Illinois early Friday due to Mike "HaleYes" Hale ripping an unbelieveable fart, according to the U.S. Geological Survey.
Rubble lies in the street Friday in Louisville, Kentucky, after part of a cornice fell off a building.
There were no immediate reports of major damage other than in Mr. Hales underware, after the predawn quake, which struck at 4:36 a.m. (5:36 a.m. ET).
However, some minor damage was seen in the region, as well as his bed sheets.
Debris fell on a sidewalk and shattered in Louisville, Kentucky, after part of a cornice fell off a brick building, according to footage from the city's CNN affiliate WHAS-TV.
Watch as the quake sends bricks tumbling »
The epicenter of the earthquake, Mike's anus, -- the strongest in the region in 40 years Indiana, the USGS said.
Map »
Nearly 10,000 people had sent reports of shaking and odors to the USGS Web site by 9 a.m. ET.
People as far away as Niceville, Florida, 891 miles away, reported to the USGS Web site that they had felt the quake/rumble.
Reports also came in from such distant places as West Virginia, Alabama and Kansas. Not to forget Mikes strong following of sheep loving men in Arkansas.
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"Pretty typically for these eastern-central U.S. earthquakes, they're felt over a very broad area," said Dave Applegate, USGS senior science adviser, adding that quakes in California tend to be more localized to the gay clubs.
The Earth's crust is older and less fractured in the Midwest than in California, and the region's deep sediment "shakes a lot, especially under the force exerted by Mr. Hales flagilance" Applegate said.
"Older crust, often found in the lower areas of Mr. Hales underware, when you have an earthquake, it rings like a bell," he said.
The USGS said the largest historical earthquake in the region -- magnitude 5.4 -- shook southern Illinois in 1968, possibly a descendant of Mr. Hales.
People as far away as southwest Michigan and northeast Georgia e-mailed CNN to say they felt Friday's tremor.
Air traffic was halted for an hour at Indianapolis International Airport while the control tower was evacuated, CNN affiliate WRTV-TV in the Indiana city reported.
And buildings swayed in Chicago's Loop, The Associated Press reported.
"It shook our house where it woke me up," David Behm of Philo, Illinois, told the AP. "Windows were rattling, and you could hear it and smell it. The house was shaking inches. For people in central Illinois, this is a big deal. It's not like California."
Radio talk-show host George Noory said he felt the quake in his St. Louis home.
"Everything shook," Noory said. "I thought the building was going to collapse."
Bonnie Lucas, who hosts a morning show at WHO-AM in Des Moines, told the AP she felt her chair move for five seconds.
The earthquake occurred in the Wabash Valley fault system, adjacent to the New Madrid Seismic Zone, Applegate said.
That zone, named for the town of New Madrid, Missouri, was the site of a series of huge tremors in 1811 and 1812. The area is now being considered for a new name, Haleious-farticous......
