Texas explained by God!!

90Blue_XJ

NAXJA Forum User
Once upon a time in the kingdom of Heaven , God was missing for six days. Eventually, Michael the Archangel found him, resting on the seventh day.

He inquired of God. "Where have you been?"

God sighed a deep sigh of satisfaction and proudly pointed downwards through the clouds, "Look, Michael. Look what I've made."

Archangel Michael looked puzzled and said, "What is it?"

"It's a planet," replied God, "and I've put Life on it. I'm going to call it Earth and it's going to be a great place of balance."

"Balance?" Inquired Michael, still confused

God explained, pointing to different parts of earth. "For example, northern Europe will be a place of great opportunity and wealth but cold and harsh while southern Europe is going to be poor but sunny and pleasant. "I have made some lands abundant in water and other lands parched deserts. This one will be extremely hot and while this one will be very cold and covered in ice."

The Archangel , impressed by God's work, then pointed to a land mass and said "What 's that one?"

"Ah," said God. "That ' s TEXAS -- the most glorious place on earth.

There are beautiful beaches, streams, hills, and forests The people from TEXAS are going to be handsome, modest, intelligent and humorous and they are going to be found traveling the world. They will be extremely sociable, hardworking and high achieving, and they will be known throughout the world as diplomats and carriers of peace."

Michael gasped in wonder and admiration but then proclaimed, "What about balance, Lord? You said there would be balance!"

God replied wisely, "Wait until you see the idiots I'll put in AUSTIN."
 
Don't know if you're diggin on Longhorns or hippies....but them there might be fightin words.
 
Don't blame Texas on God! JK, my wife and one of my sons was born there, so it can't be that bad.


And atleast there is not a town named Redneck... well that I know of.
 
And Oklahomans' dont? lol.
 
Why?
 
Because Oklahoma sucks....

I live here and we hear that joke all the time from you Texas punks. :)

Best line in a movie ever... "only steers and queers come from Texas private cowboy, and you don't much look like a steer to me so that kinda narrows it down" :)
 
I guess that makes me a steer. lol
 
Oh, now Mexico blows too? Okay culero. Watch yourself ese.
 
You know that a steer is a bull w/o balls, right?

Shhhh! He's from Oklahoma. He doesn't know the difference. To him it's a longhorn.
 
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