FedEx + Jeep + Redneck = $20 in my pocket

[AJsArmor]

And a big smile on my face. Yesterday the FedEx Ground truck went to pull off the side of the road to back in my driveway. Well....he was going a little too fast and slid on the ice right into the ditch. He was stuck bad and going nowhere. He said he was going to call for a tow truck but I told let me try with my XJ first to save him some money and let me have some fun. Hooked up the strap to the front d-ring (I had no rear bumper on) my only choice of direction to pull him was through a good foot of snow with thick ice underneath it. Already I'm thinking there is no way, no traction, big box truck that outweighs my XJ by triple.

But then it happens. This local redneck comes walking over as I'm hooking up the strap and says the magic words, "you ain't ever gonna pull dat thing out wit yer little Jeep." He babbled something else about getting his buddy's big ol' Chebby but I didn't hear it, all I was thinking is that FedEx truck WILL come out of there. So I told him to put $20 on it, he did.

I gave it about 3 good pulls and that thing wasn't budging at ALL. Out of the corner of my eye I could see that hick grinning from ear to ear. That's it, time to try and rip my XJ in half. I had my strap doubled up, so about 15 feet of it. I got about 2 feet away from the back of that truck and jammed the throttle. Wow-talk about real world product testing, that was violent. 2 more pulls and that truck popped right out of there! :cheers: HA HA HAA!! Give me my $20 sucker!

 

[RichP]

You would be suprised about what you can do. I had an 87 Isuzu trooper LS, with a 4 banger.5speed. Was having a shed put in and the guy who showed up to dump a 2 wheel dump truck of gravel pulled in to the area it was going towards the back of the house. The ground was not as frozen and solid as he thought and he sunk in up to the pumpkin. I hooked the trooper up with a 20ft piece of chain to his front Dring and my rear factory hook, put it in 4 low/1st and let the clutch out. He did not touch the gas and was in neutral, that trooper dragged him out, across the yard and into the driveway and the whole time I was having horrible visions of pieces of transmission and transfer case parts all over the yard and driveway from my main daily driver. I was pretty impressed as was the driver, he brought me my next load for free as I saved him some bucks not having to call a tow truck from the local big rig towing company and I ended up with a much bigger pad for the shed.

 

[Bent]

I thought that Crow was a delicacy for Rednecks. $20 for a meal, though, maybe a little steep.

 

[dj's 2000 xj]

One time, I drug a mustang throught the same ditch it went across @ 65 mph in a 35 zone outside the local bar. It was about 4 ft. x 4 ft. We did it before the police showed up to investigate. I had a ext. cab 4x4 s10 with new tires and 4.3 We got the car behind a garage and under cover. Its sometimes nice to be from the country. The car has since been totalled and is gone.

 

[CommandoXJ96]

I was driving a local back road recently right after it had snowed... there was maybe a 3-4 foot embankment and I see that a Dodge 2500 quad cab with some decent sized tires is stuck up kinda sideways on the side of it. Speed had definetley got the best of this guy. He had some kind of like fancy bling rims... front left rim was busted in half. I saw a yellow xterra stopped talking to the guy and was about to pass; but then the xterra took off and I decided to ask the guy if he needed a hand. The xj was able to dislodge the dodge from the enbankment and the guy had a really fun looking tire change to do. The wife and kid were with him; im sure they were having fun.

 

[HeavyMetal]

the magic words, "you ain't ever gonna pull dat thing out wit yer little Jeep." He babbled something else about getting his buddy's big ol' Chebby but I didn't hear it,

bwahahahaha

it seems every story always has the generic redneck moron saying how the jeep will never be able to do it

i love it lol

 

[TRCM]

good job...but yer lucky.

pulling backwards is a very bad thing for the gears.....

 

[MoparRobbie]

Ive got a 4banger 4sp 2wd mj and this weiner in a fullsize blazer tried to overtake me and a friend as we're headed through some gentle trails ('85 XJ 4banger 5spd 4x and my 2wd 4banger MJ) Gets wedged between two trees and up to the pumpkins in mud, truck easily weighed twice what each of our little jeeps weighed, but we pulled him out. tow straps to my rear axle and and his tow rings on my buddy's xj. Got his stuck arse out quite easily.

 

[Art Triggs]

Funny how when someone says to you you're never gonna get that thing outta there with a little Jeep...... hehheh yeah.....riiiiight....... I've tugged a few full sized vans and trucks off of my road in the winter..... coulndt make it work with my pickup, but my crappy little XJ always makes it...

 

[AJsArmor]

good job...but yer lucky.

pulling backwards is a very bad thing for the gears.....

BAH! It's not like my XJ is that old or used...89 with 230K on original motor/trans/t-case. Sometimes doing stuff like that you almost hope it breaks because then you're forced to upgrade diffs.

 

[Hypoid]

bwahahahaha

it seems every story always has the generic redneck moron saying how the jeep will never be able to do it

i love it lol

I think it's a chebbie thang. I let a chebby guy off the hook when he said he'd eat his hat if my ol Ford did that. He could have at least done some fact finding before he opened his mouth; the vehicle I pulled out came so easily I thought the strap came un-hooked.

I have to say I'm impressed with the XJ. WTG on your bet!