If I were a lot smarter and a lot less brave I'd delete that story. Oh man it pains me to read it. Don't drink and type! But I did say have a laugh on me!
1. I'm a guy into girl. All my mountain/road bikes all have girl names. They break down a lot and require a lot of maintenance. However scene the jeep has never broken down I don't think it's finicky enough for a girl name. Other than point break, Road House and Next of Kin I hate Patrick Swayze movies.
2. Yes people in Oregon (especially around Eugene) are weird and have a irrational need to share their stupid daily life. Still compared to most people here I'm quite normal. Case in point my neighbor can often be seen on the History channel Dropping Acid.