A threat to national security (JOKE maybe)

[scottmcneal]

A public school teacher was arrested today at John F. Kennedy International airport as he attempted to board a flight while in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a compass, a slide-rule and a calculator. At a morning press conference, Attorney General Eric Holder said he believes the man is a member of the notorious Al-Gebra movement. He did not identify the man, who has been charged by the FBI with carrying weapons of math instruction.
'Al-Gebra is a problem for us', the Attorney General said.. 'They derive solutions by means and extremes, and sometimes go off on tangents in search of absolute values. They use secret code names like 'X' and 'Y' and refer to themselves as unknowns, but we have determined that they belong to a common denominator of the axis of medieval with coordinates in every country. As the Greek philanderer Isosceles used to say, 'There are 3 sides to every triangle'.
When asked to comment on the arrest, President Obama said, 'If God had wanted us to have better weapons of math instruction, he would have given us more fingers and toes.'
White House aides told reporters they could not recall a more intelligent or profound statement by the President - It is believed that another Nobel Prize will follow.

 

[souske]

lulz

I hated Al-gebra in school

 

[XJLI]

MATH IS DUMB

 

[tbburg]

Walk up to a TSA checkpoint at any airport.
Set a bag with the above mentioned items on the counter.
Wait for the inevitable confused expressions.
When the question comes(it will,..) Stare in disbelief for 4 seconds, and respond "I teach math."
When the second question comes, act exasperated, and say,"I'm an Algebra instructor, dumb-a**, do you know what that is?"


Congratulations! You just made the above joke into front page headlines nationwide.

 

[RichP]

I hear Obama and Holder both are up for the National Jack S. Hitte Award....